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I've been here before...
I hate being poor.
I hate not having more than 500 pesos in my wallet. Spare me the tirade of "I should be grateful because I at least still have 500 pesos in my wallet." Do that and I'll scream at you and would ask you to please fuck off.
***
You really can't have it all.
My money ain't coming until the end of this year. By then, I'd have enough to make sure I never go hungry again next year. But fuck it! It takes too fucking long!!!
The flip side though is, I'm happy with what I'm doing. I love to write and be creative and shit. I love making things happen. I love presenting to clients and convincing them that we are the shit and that we know what we're doing - and we do because we've done it all before.
I love the time I have with my family. I get to bake blueberry muffins from scratch. I get to make triple chocolate chip cookies with my eyes closed. I get to chase my boys around the house, making them squeal with anticipation that I'm about to get them and tickle them. I love preparing my daughter's lunch box with her snacks (that by the way, I made from scratch. Suck on that Martha Stewart!)
I really can't have it all. I should be happy with the life of happiness than pining for the life of meaning. I mean, if you're happy, wouldn't the "meaning" follow? Or is happiness your meaning?
I'm confused.
I hate not having more than 500 pesos in my wallet. Spare me the tirade of "I should be grateful because I at least still have 500 pesos in my wallet." Do that and I'll scream at you and would ask you to please fuck off.
***
You really can't have it all.
My money ain't coming until the end of this year. By then, I'd have enough to make sure I never go hungry again next year. But fuck it! It takes too fucking long!!!
The flip side though is, I'm happy with what I'm doing. I love to write and be creative and shit. I love making things happen. I love presenting to clients and convincing them that we are the shit and that we know what we're doing - and we do because we've done it all before.
I love the time I have with my family. I get to bake blueberry muffins from scratch. I get to make triple chocolate chip cookies with my eyes closed. I get to chase my boys around the house, making them squeal with anticipation that I'm about to get them and tickle them. I love preparing my daughter's lunch box with her snacks (that by the way, I made from scratch. Suck on that Martha Stewart!)
I really can't have it all. I should be happy with the life of happiness than pining for the life of meaning. I mean, if you're happy, wouldn't the "meaning" follow? Or is happiness your meaning?
I'm confused.
