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Cosmetics
I used to shun anything that was described or nearly fit the description of a beauty product. I never found the use for them - I mean, what's the point of putting on make-up? I still look like myself, only in color. It was the same face, no changes and still butt fugly.
In high school, some of my friends took me in as their project. The objective? To make me look like I belong to the human race. I really didn't want to be thier friggn guinea pig but they were so assertive and they threatened me with bodily harm so I gave in.
***
Let me tell you what they were up against: I didn't have two eyebrows, I had one. I was Bert the muppet's twin sister. I had fucking facial hair! Moustache and all - I looked like a fucking brown bear. My face was ravaged by soap and constant scrubbing of a face towel that had the same texture as sand paper. They were fighting an uphill battle.
It was painful. It was torture. Waxing should be used as a form of torture, it's very effective. I can see those POWs being strapped to a chair, a gooey sugary substance poured on their chest, a piece of thin cloth placed on it and RIIIIIIIPPPP!!! "I admit it!!! I bombed Lebanon!!! I killed Ninoy!!! I Stole the Philippines' MONEY!! JUST PLEASE, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!! STOP THIS MADNESS!!!!"
Eyebrows now separated, I had the wonderful experience of having them threaded. Another great and effective form of torture. You have to experience it to really understand the torture that goes with it. Make-up was next, followed by a wonderful lecture on how to cleanse, exfoliate, moisturize my skin.
Lo and behold...I actually looked like I have 48 chromosomes.
***
Imagine that torture we women have to go through just to make sure that men find us attractive. The ripping, hair pulling, bleaching, tanning, slathering of cosmetics and what not. We go through all of that for men. We expect the same from you guys. A trim here and there, maybe shaving, maybe a spritz of cologne or something.
My hubby and I never have this problem - he's always well groomed and smells good. Gentlemen, take your cue from this...
In high school, some of my friends took me in as their project. The objective? To make me look like I belong to the human race. I really didn't want to be thier friggn guinea pig but they were so assertive and they threatened me with bodily harm so I gave in.
***
Let me tell you what they were up against: I didn't have two eyebrows, I had one. I was Bert the muppet's twin sister. I had fucking facial hair! Moustache and all - I looked like a fucking brown bear. My face was ravaged by soap and constant scrubbing of a face towel that had the same texture as sand paper. They were fighting an uphill battle.
It was painful. It was torture. Waxing should be used as a form of torture, it's very effective. I can see those POWs being strapped to a chair, a gooey sugary substance poured on their chest, a piece of thin cloth placed on it and RIIIIIIIPPPP!!! "I admit it!!! I bombed Lebanon!!! I killed Ninoy!!! I Stole the Philippines' MONEY!! JUST PLEASE, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!! STOP THIS MADNESS!!!!"
Eyebrows now separated, I had the wonderful experience of having them threaded. Another great and effective form of torture. You have to experience it to really understand the torture that goes with it. Make-up was next, followed by a wonderful lecture on how to cleanse, exfoliate, moisturize my skin.
Lo and behold...I actually looked like I have 48 chromosomes.
***
Imagine that torture we women have to go through just to make sure that men find us attractive. The ripping, hair pulling, bleaching, tanning, slathering of cosmetics and what not. We go through all of that for men. We expect the same from you guys. A trim here and there, maybe shaving, maybe a spritz of cologne or something.
My hubby and I never have this problem - he's always well groomed and smells good. Gentlemen, take your cue from this...


