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My life is a comedy
We went home to the province last weekend. Mamang passed away and the interment was on Sunday, so as tradition goes, we have to pay our last respects and take her to her final resting place. We saw relatives that we haven't seen for a long time - relatives that I love that is. Then there were the relatives that I really didn't want to see for the longest time and until now. However, the situation calls for civility and the entire brood obeyed, albeit a few unheard snide comments.
Some scenes were heartbreaking - like seeing my great aunt go from riches to rags. The only comforting thought was that she still manages to keep up her positive mood. Some scenes were just totally annoying! Like my mother's sister's kids. Talk about disillusioned! Like we fucking owe them. Take this for example: Hubby and I are already putting our migration plans into motion, however, it may be quite difficult to procure a job for ourselves with the experience we have. So, we're planning on taking vocational courses just to supplement what we know and to up our chances of getting hired as per our skills. I think it's great that hairdressers earn more than the Sr. Managers here. I'm vain and kikay enough to actually like the job (as opposed to mortuary sciences or Sanitation Engineering.) But they think that taking a vocational course is beneath them - that it's not a real degree and it would make them look like they can't afford college. Well... THEY CAN'T! Fucking Posers.
Ok... Anyway, other cousins, second cousins, aunts and uncles came over. Opening spiels were varied, from "Ang ganda ganda mo ngayon ah!" (You don't look Fugly no more!), to "Kamusta na mommy mo? Sino nga ba mommy mo?" (How's your mom? Who is your mother, for that matter?) to the ugly "Ang Taba mo ngayon ah!!" (goddamn!! You big!). To which you reply "Thank you, Mom's ok, she's your niece twice removed and you're fatter" all in one breath and quickly move away.
My cousins and I then bet on who would be the best actor and best actress in this event. Most of the pot was for Auntie Face lift with Uncle Alcoholic Moocher in second place. When the mass started, we all took our money back. Nobody was gunning for best actor or actress. It was "Best in Evening Gown Competition!" Auntie Face lift came in a beaded Sabrina neckline mermaid gown, complete with mini train.
After the mass, we had to walk in procession to the cemetery. Of course, as Filipino tradition dictates, there should be music whilst walking. I shit you not when I tell you this. This is goddamn honest to god truth! First song was Freestyle's "Bakit ngayon ka lang." Tangina...gawin bang salawahan ang lola ko? (Sasha, paki translate na lang for Shane ha?) Nagkatinginan ang mga tao. Maybe the next song will be better. Hala... "I'm not a girl, not yet a woman" By Britney Spears! Malamang di na girl ang lola ko di ba? 92 years old na kaya siya! Pinuntahan ko na ang kumag na DJ. "Sir, wala bang mejo classical ng konti" Tango naman ang gago. Ang pinatugtog...
"It's a small world after all"
At nagtaka pa ako kung bakit di umiiyak ang mga tao.
Some scenes were heartbreaking - like seeing my great aunt go from riches to rags. The only comforting thought was that she still manages to keep up her positive mood. Some scenes were just totally annoying! Like my mother's sister's kids. Talk about disillusioned! Like we fucking owe them. Take this for example: Hubby and I are already putting our migration plans into motion, however, it may be quite difficult to procure a job for ourselves with the experience we have. So, we're planning on taking vocational courses just to supplement what we know and to up our chances of getting hired as per our skills. I think it's great that hairdressers earn more than the Sr. Managers here. I'm vain and kikay enough to actually like the job (as opposed to mortuary sciences or Sanitation Engineering.) But they think that taking a vocational course is beneath them - that it's not a real degree and it would make them look like they can't afford college. Well... THEY CAN'T! Fucking Posers.
Ok... Anyway, other cousins, second cousins, aunts and uncles came over. Opening spiels were varied, from "Ang ganda ganda mo ngayon ah!" (You don't look Fugly no more!), to "Kamusta na mommy mo? Sino nga ba mommy mo?" (How's your mom? Who is your mother, for that matter?) to the ugly "Ang Taba mo ngayon ah!!" (goddamn!! You big!). To which you reply "Thank you, Mom's ok, she's your niece twice removed and you're fatter" all in one breath and quickly move away.
My cousins and I then bet on who would be the best actor and best actress in this event. Most of the pot was for Auntie Face lift with Uncle Alcoholic Moocher in second place. When the mass started, we all took our money back. Nobody was gunning for best actor or actress. It was "Best in Evening Gown Competition!" Auntie Face lift came in a beaded Sabrina neckline mermaid gown, complete with mini train.
After the mass, we had to walk in procession to the cemetery. Of course, as Filipino tradition dictates, there should be music whilst walking. I shit you not when I tell you this. This is goddamn honest to god truth! First song was Freestyle's "Bakit ngayon ka lang." Tangina...gawin bang salawahan ang lola ko? (Sasha, paki translate na lang for Shane ha?) Nagkatinginan ang mga tao. Maybe the next song will be better. Hala... "I'm not a girl, not yet a woman" By Britney Spears! Malamang di na girl ang lola ko di ba? 92 years old na kaya siya! Pinuntahan ko na ang kumag na DJ. "Sir, wala bang mejo classical ng konti" Tango naman ang gago. Ang pinatugtog...
"It's a small world after all"
At nagtaka pa ako kung bakit di umiiyak ang mga tao.
